Sisters

I've been thinking a lot about what my sisters are like.  Would we have been best friends?  Would I have been the annoying younger sister that just wanted to tag along? 

Having been the oldest child, with my brother barely a year younger than me and my sister, two and half years younger, I'm not sure what having a sibling several years older than me would be like.  I'm pretty close to Mike and Julie, but we grew up together - putting puzzles together in the basement, arguing with our parents to get a cat, walking to elementary school six blocks away.  Now, Mike & I play floor hockey together on Sundays.  Julie and I talk regularly and have our normal sisterly "discussions".  I can't imagine my life without them in it. 

Although I will never know, I wonder how my life would be different with two older sisters.  I'm curious if we would have a relationship like Julie and I have.  If we would be best friends one day and arguing about petty things the next.  If I couldn't wait to see them again if they moved away and if I would plan trips to visit them in Spain or New Jersey.  Would they have taught me how to put on make-up or what was the most fashionable style?  Would they comfort me if I was having boy trouble?

I'm curious what they look like and if I will look like them.  Are they tall and slender (that means I can get there with my diet!) or am I the tallest?  I always thought I was a taller Korean growing up.  I was in the back row in pictures in elementary school.  Gone are those days and now I stand in the front row or two in the MN Chorale.  I wear heels in hopes that I might end up in the next row up.  Do they have straight hair and brown eyes?

Another thought that weighs heavily on my mind is if they even know that I was born alive.  Or, did my birth parents, in the effort to avoid questions, tell them that I had died?  I hope they will be happy to meet me, but they could be too shocked or ashamed that our parents carried that lie with them.  Maybe my birth parents won't tell them that I am searching for them. 

I pray that I will be able to meet them in June or some day.